jazzsequence

polarity

i realized today that i’ve been really hyper today and yesterday.  this coming off a fairly long string of being tired, in a bad mood, somewhat depressed, and feeling generally worthless and hopeless with regards to the job situation.  nothing’s changed since then, but my mood has swung suddenly and drastically.  which then makes me think about how, yes, everyone on my biomom’s side of the family has chemical imbalance issues, and i’ve always sort of thought i had them too, just i’ve learned to keep things in check.  reflecting specifically on how hopeless i felt a couple days ago makes me think my current manic phase might be more than just a good mood.

or not.  i might just be in a better mood and out of the funk i was in…

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Chris Reynolds

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4 responses to “polarity”

  1. Tara Avatar
    Tara

    or maybe just reading too much into the good mood?

    Reply
  2. jazzs3quence Avatar
    jazzs3quence

    always a possibility. however, one of the things that i thought was interesting was that most of the time i'm tired all the time, especially when i first get to work. lethargy is a common symptom of clinical depression and/or other chemical imbalance type stuff and that does run in my family. when i was in my manic phase (which seems to have passed, possibly swung the other way now), i was wide awake and bright eyed, even though i hadn't had anymore sleep than normal, in fact, possibly less. /shrug. erin sez it's not a thing if it can be overcome or dealt with. and i don't think i need meds or anything, i just always wonder if there's something to the genetics, or if it is just me reading into it too much. for that matter, i dont' really know anything about my half-sister's issues other than she was going in for possible diagnosis and meds like 12 years ago when last i saw her, so i'm pretty much taking other people's word on the theory that it's even been passed down to my generation.

    Reply
  3. Tara Avatar
    Tara

    or maybe just reading too much into the good mood?

    Reply
  4. jazzs3quence Avatar
    jazzs3quence

    always a possibility. however, one of the things that i thought was interesting was that most of the time i’m tired all the time, especially when i first get to work. lethargy is a common symptom of clinical depression and/or other chemical imbalance type stuff and that does run in my family. when i was in my manic phase (which seems to have passed, possibly swung the other way now), i was wide awake and bright eyed, even though i hadn’t had anymore sleep than normal, in fact, possibly less. /shrug. erin sez it’s not a thing if it can be overcome or dealt with. and i don’t think i need meds or anything, i just always wonder if there’s something to the genetics, or if it is just me reading into it too much. for that matter, i dont’ really know anything about my half-sister’s issues other than she was going in for possible diagnosis and meds like 12 years ago when last i saw her, so i’m pretty much taking other people’s word on the theory that it’s even been passed down to my generation.

    Reply

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