so we’ve been watching the new bionic woman series. why? two words: katee sackhoff. other than that, it’s yet another remake of an old tv show. since battlestar galactica there’s been — that i know of — dr. who (which would have been fantastic were it not for the fact that the doctor couldn’t be more monotonous — not saying anything against christopher eccleston, he’s fantastic, but the character was written really badly — and the british pop star/female co-star was neither hot nor particularly interesting. the plots felt like recycled sci-fi and i lost my suspension of disbelief with the line “he’s downloading the internet.” which was after they had this exchange:
random tech guy: don’t worry, that door is encrypted with a thousand passcodes.
dr.: he’s a genius, he can decrypt a thousand million passcodes in less than 10 seconds.
[ 30 seconds later ]
random tech guy: oh my god, he got through!
there’s the new flash gordon (i haven’t even bothered with this, it sounded too awful to bear), and now bionic woman, which should be subtitled: another tv series remake. i’m sure i’m missing some.
but we’re watching it for katee sackhoff, who is our new favorite actress. the problem is — or problems are: her screen appearances are too few and far between; she’s basically playing the Six Cylon from BSG (the actress of which, i’m told by my pop culture source-of-all-gossipy-celebrity-information, erin, is katee’s real life BFF); and she’s not given enough opportunity to be snarky. and that’s what katee does best — snark. it would be somewhat redeemed if she at least kicked the crap out of michelle ryan — who plays the show’s title character — more often. but no, they have one fight scene at the end of the first ep and then she’s hardly seen in episode 2. wah. but i will continue to watch it because it’s got katee sackhoff and if they kill off her character then i will no longer have any reason to watch it at all.
the show itself is an alias clone with different actors, with occasional random interjections of the m’f’ing gilmore girls. nothing against gilmore girls — well, nothing aside from the watered-down, saccharine, easily digestible with a spoonful of sugar variety of “feminism” they tout — i just didn’t order a side of heartwarming with my asskicking badass chick show. and there’s major plot holes too, like, okay, if they’re going to have some semblance of ethics and only implant these superduper bionic limbs and stuff on a person who would otherwise have to have those limbs amputated due to some horrible accident, their ethics kinda go completely out the window when they do it on those people without them knowing or consenting. i mean, come on. in that case, why isn’t the whole organization bionic? if you don’t care about getting permission, why aren’t all your agents just required to lop off their limbs to get supercyber ones? at least in alias everyone was more or less on par with the badassedness, no one was anymore superspiff than anyone else, they just had different skillsets, and in buffy there was only one (okay, two) slayers who didn’t ask to be, but that was a plot point and no one else could get it even if they were hit by a car and needed new arms and legs. (well, up until the super witch used the power of the ancient scythe-thing that looked an awful lot like some custom sword dealie some modern LA D&D-geeking metalsmith would craft that held the power of the Slayer and released it into the ether so that any girl who could potentially ever be a Slayer suddenly was one.) ok i’m done. katee sackhoff needs to be in more stuff, especially since this is supposed to be the last season of bsg :(
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